I was eighteen, in a hospital, and left alone with a male radiation technician. I was put in a horrific situation which was witnessed by someone else who walked in the room. I still see the young man’s shocked expression. Time froze as our eyes met, and he left before being seen by the technician. To cope, I locked the door on that memory. Locked so tight, it’s not listed on my bio.
Yesterday evening the scene replayed, and I was faced with a choice. Would I allow the tail-spin, the heavy cloak of emotions, and the mental wound examination? I didn’t want to go there. I want to always walk in freedom. I tried to read God’s word looking for answers, but sometimes even focusing on the word is tough.A song came to mind by Scott Krippayne, You are Still God. Yet for some reason my computer music library only contained part of the song. I clicked over to i-Tunes, and while I was waiting for the upload, four songs were suggested. I usually ignore their recommendations, but this time, I listened. And while I listened, God’s truth poured out healing.
Here are the songs chosen by God to help me to focus on Him, to release that memory and see beyond the pain.
Timeless by Selah from the CD Timeless the Selah Collection. “…Time. I’m touched by many things, so many things I don’t understand. Seasons pass and I discover above all this there’s another helping me to belong to what is timeless…Change whether it’s good or bad, you know I’m glad You’re in control. Lord, if I don’t understand I know Your hand will shield my soul…” Timeless by Selah
Nothing takes You by Surprise by Mark Harris, from the CD Windows and Walls. “…Every now and then when life falls apart there’s a truth I trust, that calms my heart. Nothing takes You by surprise. … Sometimes the hard times seem senseless and random like life’s just a series of chances. But come what may, you never left us abandoned. You are God over all circumstances. And nothing on earth could ever change Your plans, You’re in control, we’re in Your hands. Nothing takes You by surprise. …There’s a comfort just to realize, nothing takes You by surprise.” Nothing takes You by Surprise by Mark Harris
The Name Lives on by David Phelps, from the CD Life is a Church “…When I’m awakened by a terrifying dream, and desperation reaches out and clutches me. When I’m so afraid that I don’t know what to pray, I simply speak it and feel it and it chases fear away. Delivered from the lips of God to Mary’s ears on angel wings. Jesus, Jesus. The word that came to life for us, the song that all creation sings. Jesus, Jesus” – The Name Lives on by David Phelps
My heart will sing by Shannon Wexelberg, Charles Billingsley, and Scott Krippayne, from the CD Better Than Life “Jesus my heart will sing your praises and I won’t be afraid of what this life may bring. Jesus with all that is in me I’m living in this victory You have won for me.…All my chains are stripped away, in my heart You’ve left Your name a hidden rending of this freedom I have gained. I can’t believe you’ve chosen me. You helped my blinded eyes to see, and now I rest in every promise You have made.” – My Heart will sing by Shannon Wexelberg, Charles Billingsley, and Scott Krippayne
Heavenly Father, I don’t understand why some things happen, but I do know You are always in control and You shield my soul. Nothing takes You by surprise, and I am always in Your hands. And the times when fear clutches me, I can speak the name of Jesus and rise up in freedom. All my chains are stripped away, and my heart sings praises as I live and rest in the victory Christ won for me. Father, I pray for both men. I pray for the one who did wrong that he will repent and come to know You. I also pray for the young man who was a witness, please heal his memories and don’t allow the enemy to use that in negative ways. Thank You, Jesus. Thank You, Heavenly Father! I give the memory to You and rest in the knowledge and freedom of Your love. I am free!